Walls

For years and years
I built a wall
and stuffed the space
behind it full
of wounds and hurts
and needs

all those unspoken needs
Some very small
some not so much
most not even voiced
the space filled and
filled and filled
 
Until one day the pressure
was too great
a small crack and
finally broken
open wide

I can't hide behind it
anymore - no matter
how hard I try

it's scary
not having a wall

It's raw and emotional

I can't pretend
to hide

I fall apart
in an instant
at insignificant things
or sometimes

nothing at all

Healing is so
much harder
than hiding
ever was

Some days I long
for the safety
of my wall...

The dragonfly, in almost every part of the world symbolizes change and change in the perspective of self realization; and the kind of change that has its source in mental and emotional maturity and the understanding of the deeper meaning of life.

Arriving on the scene around 300 million years ago, dragonflies are one of the first insects to inhabit this planet. They’ve had a long time to perfect the art of flying, hunting and just being amazing.

The dragonfly represents this journey I have been on for the last decade or so. Paired with a broken fence, it represents the walls I’ve been busy tearing down.

Since I was 5 years old, I’ve been building walls to hold my emotions back. Healing has forced me to tear down those walls.