Perhaps Vicky and I never felt significant. Vicky White and me have so many similarities. Our stories, Vicky’s and mine are not dress rehearsals, we didn’t get a redo when things went sour. Of course, this is true of all people.
As an innocent young woman, I swan-dived into bearing children, achieving higher education, and producing the American dream. Only 28 years later, the baritone of a convict’s intentions awoke in me a relentless, intoxicating pleasure. Passion streaked from the depths of the cosmos, across eons of time, shizzling, snapping, and sparking like a tesla coil of providence. Maybe the decades of relative drought created in me a magnet of sorts, drawing the pulse to me. Unknowingly, my lifestyle had developed a distinct weakness in me for John Manard’s plight.
Meanwhile, prison, like a Petrie dish under perfectly manipulated lab conditions, induced in John Manard and Casey White high doses of unnaturally subdued passion, or social need, or testosterone, or however you choose to describe it.
Then, as if the concoction weren’t volatile already, the physical confinement and social restrictions made me feel controlled and safe to abandon my personal barriers. To Casey and John, the subtle human communications from Vicky and me signaled, “all systems are go!”
The similarities between Vicky and me are plentiful. After exemplary careers, we fell for convicted murderers and assisted in their non-violent escapes by simply driving away. John and I went to Tennessee and were on the run for 12 days. Casey and Vicky were tracked thru Tennessee and ran for 11 days. John is 21 years younger than me, and Casey is 22 years junior to Vicky. I won’t speculate on Vicky’s state of mind, but I lost everything of value and meaning and seriously considered the path Vicky took.
Vicky white and me had similar stories, right up until the very end. Vicky tragically denied herself the opportunity to explore living with conviction. To me, Vicky’s death symbolizes the result of immeasurable, unrelenting pain which prevented her from seeing hope on the other side of darkness. I don’t blame Vicky.
My path ran through punishment, accountability, and pain, but healing provided a strength of character and opportunities to make the world a better place.
Any decision has the potential of life or death consequences.
None of us is our worst mistake.
Dear Toby:
These recent events may not be easy for you, perhaps causing you to relive some painful memories. But your humble yet couragious compassion for Vicky White, John Maynard, and Casey White is profoundly touching to me, and reflects the compassion you were able to first find for yourself (with God’s tender grace and help).
Thank you for being the voice that perhaps we all need to hear!
Very true!
Dear Toby,
These recent events may not be easy for you, perhaps causing you to relive some painful memories. But your humble yet courageous compassion for Vicky White, John Maynard, and Casey White is profoundly touching to me, and reflects the compassion you were able to first find for yourself (with God’s tender grace and help).
Thank you for being the voice that perhaps we all need to hear.
My sorrow goes out for Vicky White. She was a victim and didn’t get to see the forgiveness peopke would have had for her. She had so much life left to give as you Toby hsve proven in yout your outreach to others who have had similar emotions and situationd. We all make terriblele mistskes that hurt others. Thank you for your blog Toby.
Thanks for seeing that none of us is our worst mistake.
Yes so true. For all have sinned and fall short of the Glory of God. Romans 3:23.
Amen!
From the time I heard of the escape I have struggled to understand why Vicky would risk everything. I came across a article that said you knew why. I then watched your Dateline Nbc episode and it further explained how it could all happen. Your life is such an example of redemption, purpose and fulfillment. As you say we are not our worst mistake.